Letters to God, Part I

Because days! Come and go!
But my feelings for you are


Papa Roach - Forever

_{28th of December 2009}
When I turned my icq on I received a message from ~Al69
"Oh God. I'm crying. Rev died."

I don't believe first. Only checking avengedsevenfold.com let me understand something terrible happened. We don't know what happened - all we have are the lame rumors, which make the situation even worse, though.

You were always one of those,
Blessed with lucky sevens,
And the voice to make me cry.
My, oh, my.

Placebo - Song to Say Goodbye

_{29th of December 2009}
Lying in the back of the car, listening to the song on the radio...

I’ve tried to go on like I never knew you,
I’m awake but my world is half asleep.
I pray for this heart to be unbroken,
But without you all I’m going to be is
Incomplete...

Backstreet Boys - Incomplete

_{30th of December 2009}
Waking up in tear.
"Jimmy is alive!...no."

Now just listen to my words,
Even though they sound not smart...
He's alive and you feel that,
Put his life into your heart.
(tune of Breaking Benjamin - The Diary of Jane. That's all I could write that time.)

_{31th of December 2009}
"You know, rockstars never die."
We drink for Jimmy and make the same New Year wish...

We would do anything to bring him back to you.
We would do anything to end what your going through.
If only sorrow could build a staircase, or tears could show the way.
I would climb my way to heaven, and bring him back home again.
I would do anything to bring him back to you.
Because if you got him back, I would get back the friend that I once knew.

Bring Me the Horizon - Suicide Season

_{2010 starts. Days begin to blur.}
"How can I be ever happy again?!"

And I need some space,
to clean my head,
to think about my life.
With or without you.

Mile by mile we're farther apart
And it's one empty bottle
And two broken hearts
Night after night we are falling apart
Now it's two broken bottles
And four empty hearts

Decompression
Depression period

Papa Roach - Decompression Period

This song gave me an idea for a drawing. I didn't finish it and need to re-do.

_{3rd of January 2010}
I remember, Al told me about listening to Papa Roach's Forever and thinking of Jimmy. Hmm, there's something funny about this word - make a simple picture, Al posts in on Twitter. The next day or so, Zacky writes a message, ending with foREVer. I still wonder, do we just think in the same way, or...

_{Somethingth of January 2010}
All the time, I can't believe, I refuse to believe Jimmy is gone. I want it to be an awful joke, we will hate them all for it...but he'll be alive.
I want him to come back so much..
And being scared for other guys, thanks to Mr.Haner.

All this pain,
Take this life and make it yours.
All this hate, take your heart and let it love again.
You will survive it somehow...

Life starts now!
You've done all the things that could kill you somehow and you're so far down.
Life starts now.
You've done all the things that could kill you somehow and you're so far down.
Life starts now.

Three Days Grace - Life Starts Now

_{I'm not sure at all whichth of January 2010}
Matt posts a message, in which he tells about Jimmy's two wishes and says that it would be too egoistic to make him stay.
Changes my whole point of view. I stopped asking for him to return...

Please, don't question WHY!
I left this way!

Avenged Sevenfold - Brompton Cocktail

_{A year has passed...}
But damn it all. I thought to let him go from my mind. But I still can't admit Jimmy's gone. How can it be possible? I hear his voice, singing right to my heart, his wild drum beats and rhythms and piano notes that make me shiver and run and jump around my place. I never wish him rest, I'm sure he'd prefer rocking.

I'm not over, I'm not over you just yet,
Cannot hide it, you're not that easy to forget.
I'm not over.

Carolina Liar - I'm Not Over

I'll keep him alive in my heart. Until my last breath is taken away. And I'm intend to live forever, or die trying.


And today, I burn my letters to God.
But when burning them, I hope the one I wrote them to will hear me.

Unbreak him, unchain him,
He needs another chance
To live

--

I've burnt five of these small letters, on my own window. Used a tray covered in tinfoil (not to burn my flat), a tripod and a remote. Maybe in my head this photo looked in other way...but I love what I got.

You can download it. You can share it wherever you want. You can NOT claim it as your own. It's just a question of respect.

And my last, but not the least request.
I really want to know your opinion, thoughts and everything you wans to say or share. Do comment.

But do fucking not, if all you're going to write is "R.I.P. The Rev" I cry everytime I see these letters. Seriously. I'll just hide your comment.

Oh yeah. Go to your parents, friends, pets, all those ones you love, and tell them "I love you." I did.

If you have read all this shit, thank you.